Technical Definition
by That's LEON
Summary: He had always believed that darkness was the absence of light. Cleon.


**Technical Definition  
**_Toothpaste Addict_

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**warning: **contains what I'd call "tasteful references to sex." (Srsly guys, my smut is -nothing- like this. At all.)

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He had always believed that darkness was the absence of light. It made sense that way, to think something that he'd once had had been stolen from him, and all he had to do was reclaim it. It was more doable, seeking an external light instead of seeking to eradicate the darkness within him. So he believed it, and he pursued the vague notion of "light" feverishly--pursued and fought the man he believed had taken his precious light and hidden it away somewhere.

In retrospect, it had been a foolish endeavor. Sephiroth had been nothing more than an excuse--a face to put on the darkness that he couldn't identify any other way. But the figurehead became indistinguishable from the real thing, and he lost sight of his original pursuit. All he hunted was Sephiroth--and he hunted blindly, obsessively, constantly--with no regard for the light.

Tifa caught him off guard, her promises of love and hope too bright to do anything other than blind him. Until then, he never would've believed that darkness could coexist with light; after all, he'd always believed that darkness was merely a lack thereof. But he was proven wrong.

They nearly broke him, two forces so far beyond his control overwhelming him completely from both ends of the spectrum, tearing him apart at opposite ends. This wasn't the light he'd imagined, the light he'd sought. It wasn't the light that would chase away the darkness, and it wasn't the light he needed. And so he learned from Tifa that darkness really wasn't the absence of light, but an entity all of its own.

That raised the question of what _light_ was.

Leon didn't catch him off guard, because he didn't catch him at all. There was no definite point in time, no moment of truth when suddenly it all came together. It was a tentative progression, an unplanned meander away from friendship and in the general direction of something else. They both wanted more, but neither wanted to push for it, determined to always stay on the same page, and the transition was slow but sure.

It continued that way through their first night together, everything slow and thorough--the draw of his quivering breaths and the curl of fingers inside of him, the low rumble of purring moans in his throat as the other memorized his body. Everything was deliberate, from the press of warm lips against his heated skin, to the drag of his tongue along the throbbing pulse in the other man's throat, to the curve of his fingers along Leon's hip as he took the other in and reveled in the trapped groan that escaped against his ear as he was filled in a way he'd never experienced before.

They moved in harmony, and he swallowed every sound in a kiss that was deep but languid, the wet heat between their mouths impossibly intimate and entirely intoxicating. They both held themselves to the torturous rhythm that smouldered between them, neither willing to give in first; so they took it slowly, confining themselves to that pace even as their bodies trembled desperately for release, kisses growing almost frantic as they sought the will power to hold back.

They came in almost perfect unison, Cloud with a shuddering moan in the repeated shape of the other man's name, Leon with a groan that snared in his throat before it spilled over his lips. And as they did, Cloud came to realize that Leon had unraveled the threads of darkness around him--had helped him shed them as he had his inhibitions and his clothes.

And without them, he was left with something else entirely. There was no way to describe what it _was_, only what it _wasn't_, and he knew he would have taken it for granted if he'd never been submersed in darkness.

He'd never heard Leon laugh before that night, and it almost startled him when the brunet chuckled, the sound muffled against his spiky hair, and murmured something that he knew he wasn't supposed to quite catch. So he just smiled and traced idle patterns on the older man's arm, knowing that he'd have a chance to say _I love you, too,_ some other time.

And so he learned from Leon that light was really the absence of darkness.

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**A/N: **THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE CUTE. 8c

If you're waiting for the next bit of Cathexis, please ... keep waiting lol 8D; I'm writing the next 4 chapters or so at once, so I HAVE worked on it a lot, but I don't have anything that I can upload yet. XD

Also, this has been on my dA for like a week. So, y'know. Stalking me has its advantages.

_Studies still show that reviewing makes you sexier 8D;;_


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